Finally—cookies that tell the truth! Misfortune Cookies are here to ruin your day in the most delicious way possible. Forget “You will find love soon” or “An opportunity awaits.” These cookies hit harder than your last therapy bill: “Your job will be automated,” “He’s just not that into you,” and “That weird noise in your car isn’t going away.” Crunchy, brutally honest, and sprinkled with despair, they’re the perfect snack for pessimists, realists, and anyone who’s allergic to false hope.
These aren’t just snacks; they’re life lessons in sugar form. Every bite comes with a crisp reminder that the universe has a sense of humor—and it’s dark. Crack one open at your next dinner party and watch your friends go from laughter to existential crisis in seconds. It’s entertainment and emotional damage, all in one convenient cookie.
They’re also great for corporate events! Nothing motivates a team like a cookie that says, “You probably won’t get that promotion.” Pair it with lukewarm coffee, and you’ve got yourself a productivity boost fueled entirely by spite.
So next time you’re craving a little snack and a large dose of reality, reach for a Misfortune Cookie. They taste like disappointment—but at least they’re honest about it.
