You know you’re in deep with your weird little collectibles addiction when a resin pickle man stares into your soul with more intensity than your therapist. Enter the Pickle Back Resin Figure by the mad scientist of sculptural nightmares, Cig Neutron. This is not just a pickle. This is a half-pickled, possibly-possessed, mustachioed fever dream wearing cowboy boots. I bought it thinking I was ironic. Now I wake up at 3am hearing him whisper “One more shot of whiskey, cowboy.”
The craftsmanship is undeniable. The vibes? Cursed. This thing looks like what happens when a Vlasic jar gets struck by lightning during a séance. He has the energy of a man who got turned into a pickle in 1874 and now roams from shelf to shelf demanding duel satisfaction. It’s resin. It’s unholy. It’s glorious. And yes, my grandma did try to baptize it.
If you’re looking for a conversation piece that ends most conversations immediately, this is your guy. Your guests will either respect your taste in art or immediately leave and never return. Either way, Pickle Back wins. Do I regret buying him? No. Do I think he’s watching me right now from atop my monitor wearing a tiny hat I didn’t put on him? Yes. Yes, I do.
