$30 for a Damn Haunted House Tucker Hat Custom Embroidered Listen, if you’re gonna spend $30 on anything this $35.95
If You Don’t Drink Hat Custom Embroidered Cap Some people wear their heart on their sleeve. Others? $35.95
Have Your Elf A Merry Little Christmas Socks wonders shout, “Have Your ELF a Merry Little Christmas” $15.99
Nobody Asked You Hat Custom Embroidered There’s nothing quite as satisfying as a well-timed, soul-piercing $35.95
Megadeth Magnetic Jack Rack® Key Holder Finally—a key holder that screams, “I love organization and $39.99
Masked Machete Killer Wiper Blade Decal Ah yes, the Masked Machete Killer Wiper Blade Decal—the $24.99
Justifiably Furious Sticker – Feminist Glitter Vinyl Sticker Finally, a sticker that says exactly what your heart’s $4.99
I’m Not Like Other Girls I Have Hemorrhoids Iridescent Acrylic Motel Keychain Some people collect keychains for style, some for memories, $9.60
Stop Honking! Driver is Conducting Research on Wikipedia Bumper Sticker Nothing says “cutting-edge navigation” like swerving across three lanes $10.50
Swearing Helps Oven Mitt Bakeware Oven Mitts Ah, cooking. That magical domestic ritual where you attempt $19.99
Pirate Fruit Whiskey & Wine Decanter, 34 OZ Anime Pirate Devil Colored Barware You ever look at your bar setup and think… $89.99
Buy These Gifts If You’re Going Straight to Hell Anyway 13 Offensively Funny Products That’ll Ensure You Skip Purgatory
On My Way To Jury Guilt (He’s Guilty – I Already Decided) Nothing says “fair trial” like strutting into jury duty $10.50
People Who Get Diarrhea Custom Embroidered Hat Some people wear hats to show team loyalty. Others $35.95
Skull Decanter Large Set with 4 Skull Shot Glasses Behold: the Skull Decanter Set. It’s the perfect centerpiece $69.99
Who the F is Rachel Ahahah Custom Embroidered Fish Tank Hat Who the F is Rachel? Nobody knows, but apparently $35.95