So I ordered this custom hat that says “I Got My Ate”—a proud tribute to my sister. But people keep asking if it means I literally got eaten. One guy at a BBQ whispered, “Is that a survival story?” Another shouted, “Congrats, bro! Finally scored!” Even my own mom texted, “Call me. Are you in a gang now?” I wore it to church. Big mistake. The pastor paused mid-sermon to say, “Let us pray for this man and his devoured sibling.” Moral of the story? Don’t mix Filipino slang with English unless you’re ready to accidentally start a horror rumor. Still wearing it, though. It’s iconic now. My Ate is proud. I think.
